I wish I had a miraculous update to bring. Sweet Ezra is not doing well. In fact everyday has been getting worse. Ezra has been diagnosed with Chronic Lung Disease. His left lung is worse than the right. His oxygen needs are anywhere between 50-70%. His ventilator settings continue to increase when the goal is to decrease. He is suffering from a heart arrhythmia that causes his oxygen saturations to constantly drop. The doctors have stopped his caffeine (stimulant) and had a Cardiologist evaluate him. The Cardiologist believes this arrhythmia is related to prematurity and will eventually grow out of it.
Honestly I don't know how to process or handle any of this. Truth is I'm extremely angry. Doors have been slammed, yelling has taken place and tears never seem to end. I know at any moment God has the power to overturn all this, I guess that's why I'm even more upset. I wish I could stand and say I am a faithful servant, but to see my son struggling on life support only getting worse I can't proclaim anything. I'm hurt, I feel like I am being punished witnessing this struggle between good vs evil on the life of my child.
To see his sweet little eyes look up at us, makes my heart melt. We'd do anything, give anything to see him get well.
No comments:
Post a Comment