Double Chin

Chunky boy,

You weigh 5lbs 11oz! You have two chins! They are both adorable by the way. You continue to amaze the doctors. Dr. Knee called today and was so excited you were down in the 30s for your oxygen, you could hear the disbelief in his voice!

All your brothers and sister came to visit today. Lincoln and Graham both tried climbing in the crib with you. It was a bit crazy with all of us shoved into a little room!

Daddy snapped a few photos of me holding you, it's what I look forward to all day!

We all love you very much,

Xoxox
Mom

Down a Peep!

You are down another peep setting (7) on your cpap machine! You handled the change very well. Your oxygen needs are at 45%. The goal is a peep of 5 and your oxygen needs less than 25% in order for you to trial nasal cannula. Once you get to the cannula you can eat by mouth, as long as you're not breathing fast. There's so many ifs and so many doubts, we just have to surrender everything and let God take control. You are 38weeks gestation and I'm still praying that by 40 weeks you'll be breathing and eating! Sounds crazy?! But I continue to believe in healing and miracles.

Daddy got all the snuggle time today! He loves you so much. You were such a cutie looking around wide eyed. I snapped a gazillion photos of you!

Your butt rash is getting worse. I'm praying for wisdom when it comes to your nutrition needs. I'm told breastmilk isn't  enough. You need extra calories, calcium and phosphorus for proper bone and brain development. That extra calories comes from a fortifier they add to my milk. This stuff is like acid it burns your little bottom leaving red circles that bleed. I can't even imagine the pain you're feeling. You are the strongest boy I know!

Rest up because you have an eye exam in the morning. Those tend to make you crabby for the remainder of the day.

Love you,

Xoxo,
Mom

3 Months Old

It's official... You're 3 months old! Some days it seems like this journey is no where near ending, and then the next day the Lord renews our strength and we can handle another day. If there's anything you taught me through this, is that life is not guaranteed. I used to put off quality time with the ones I cherish because I was too busy with other miniscule things. That has changed since having you, sweet boy. I cherish every second I get to spend time with you. I could stare at you all day! You have blessed our lives in your short 3 months. We live for today now and not for tomorrow.

We love you so much! When I wake up in the morning to an empty space next to my bed (where your sleeper will go) I tend to cry. I miss you here! My heart knows I have a son miles away and the pain never seems to go away. This is when daddy steps in to give me his famous pep talk (he should be a motivational speaker!)

The sun has risen and its a new day! We rest today knowing God has you surrounded by angels, and soon those angels will head over here, your home, and  surround you.

3 month stats:

5lbs 7oz
17 inches long
You fit into newborn clothes and newborn size diapers!

Keep growing!!

Xoxo,
Mom

P.s. Raegan went with me to visit you today! She adores you! We all do! :-)

P.s.s The flu has hit our home tonight! :-(  I'm praying with everything I got, I don't get it, if I do then I can't come be with you!

Airing the Buns

Sweet boy,

You got a diaper rash that will not go away! It's been 3 weeks and its still lingering on! The doctor ordered magic butt cream and if that doesn't work you'll be one of two cases out of hundreds that they'll have to figure out a different feeding supplement too. I suggested magic nipple cream and the doctor just laughed and went to look it up. He said if this butt cream doesn't work he'll be receptive to try the nipple cream. Haha! Hopefully one day you can look back on this and laugh! :-) For now, when I'm up there holding you I let you go au natural from the waist down. Surprisingly you enjoyed the air on your buns, so much so that you were in such a deep sleep drooling all over my hand.

You had an uneventful day. No news is good news!  He expects you to make it to nasal cannula in the coming weeks! We pray it's sooner than weeks....  Get some rest because tomorrow the whole gang is coming up to see you! It's your brother Grahams 3rd birthday. He still asks about you everyday, and he thinks every baby he sees is Eshrah!

Xoxo,
Mom

P.s. your brother Parker made you this onesie!

Big Boy Crib

You got a big boy crib today! Along with the crib Raegan and I made you a banner to go above your crib. We also hung some other decorations up in your room.
You were doing so well today they decided to turn down your peep on your cpap machine. Yay!
My prayer today was for God to wow the  doctors! You dropped from 53% oxygen to 37% in one day! God is so good. We continue to pray for progress, I can see in your eyes you desperately want to eat with your mouth! Soon it will happen.  We are praying strong boy, and God is answering!

Xoxo,
Mom

P.s I was able to give you a bath tonight and your brother Parker snapped some photos.  :-)

Healing Eyes

Answered prayers! Your eyes are healing. The doctor said they are mature and stage 1 rop disease. Should continue to get better with time.
Sadly, no changes have been made on your cpap settings. The doctors feel you are breathing too fast and your oxygen level is too high. You are fast approaching 40 weeks when mom and dad will have to make some tough decisions. We are still crying out to God that he'd heal your lungs fully and no tough decisions would have to be made! We believe in miracles! God can rain fire down from heaven, spring forth flowing water from a rock, and bring the dead back to life, He can heal you in this short amount of time! He's already amazed us through you! Not many people can say they witnessed a miracle in the flesh, but we can!

Love you sweet boy! Hopefully you enjoy those books mommy and daddy recorded for you!

Xoxo,

Mom

Wide awake!

It was so much fun to see you wide awake and alert! You looked at a book for awhile. I think you're going to have beautiful brown eyes, which evens out the eye color in the family, 4 blue/hazel and 4 brown!
You had a great day today, where I thought, wow I think you turned a corner! You sucked vigorously on your pacifier, which your nurse said is a sign of health! Your nails are growing long, which she said is another sign health! Swelling has gone down a bit, and your blood gas is great! Today, the doctors should lower your peep on your cpap.
I bought a recorder so we can record our voices reading you books to play back to you when we aren't there. You love hearing voices! We brought all of your brothers and sisters to visit tonight, and you loved the chaos! Ha! Lincoln pulled out the suction tubing, someone else tripped over the cpap machine.  Raegan asked to hold you a million times. She can't wait to smother you with hugs and kisses when you get home. You have 4 brothers and a sweet sister who can't wait much longer to bring you home. You are loved more than you could imagine.

Xoxo,
Mom

P.s. you weigh 5lbs 6oz!